unfolding.

My thoughts lately have been this; perhaps life is like origami.

Before you question my sanity on the subject of life, let me explain.

I was recently reading a devotional that focused on the idea of trusting God for every moment and season of life, even the things that seem pointless. She says,

"obey and trust that He is working. His timing is rarely ours, but it is always perfect. Instead of chafing under the seemingly mundane embrace each task as a building block for the dreams in your heart. Don't give up hope." Amy Carroll

When I think about what desires and dreams I have for my own life, I seem to jump into a state of questioning my present circumstances, whispering things to myself (and others) like "if only I could hurry up and finish this degree...start this...finish that..." in a vicious cycle of wanting the future, in the present. I seem to become frustrated and anxious about the things that occupy me and my time in the present, when I am focusing so hard on the future and what my life could be.

Which brought me to think about the reason why every moment, action and experience, is part of the story God has written out for me in my life. And why I have to trust that.

I guess my life is unfolding, moment by moment, day by day...  or better yet, these experiences and moments and seasons, are folding and moulding my life into who God desires for me to be, and what He has ordained me to do in this life.

Perhaps life is like origami then. 

Every fold, every delicate crease that you make when you create a piece of origami, is important. Every gesture and creation of a shape is significant, leading to more creases and folds and finally producing a whole, a final creation. Life.

And the interesting thing is, when you look at the final creation- all you see is the refined paper creation. 

But having attempted origami myself, I know the steps that are involved, and the time and patience it takes to create that final creation.

And when you unfold the origami, looking at the once smooth paper, now creased and wrinkled all over, all those steps of folding, creasing, and even the mistakes, are revealed. 


What seems like such a final and whole creation, is in fact, made up of so many steps and processes that you come to appreciate the final paper shape more, knowing how it came to be.

And so, when you reflect on your life as a whole, from your past and where you are now in the present, think about all the folds, creases, and mistakes that have made up you. 

Every moment, every season, every experience is, and continues, to make you, you.

If you unfolded your life, what you would reveal is that all these little, (perhaps even mundane, pointless, hard, terrifying) experiences, actions and moments make up your life as whole. 

All these seasons have a purpose... to create the final, beautiful creation, which is you. 

Every tear, fear, worry, smile, and laugh... every person, place and experience is all a fold and crease in God's design for your life and purpose on this earth. 

And guess who is doing all that folding?

God. 

God is folding and moulding your life. Yes, you are the one living it day after day, in your feelings and decisions, but God is the ultimate Creator and He takes pride in His creation. He knows where your life is going, and what it will look like at the end. 

And that's why you have to trust in knowing that He is in control and He is creating you through every crease and fold. 

2014 and an Avocado.

salut & hi!

So, it is a new year. 2014.

While there are so many things to say about this- I am just going to say a few words...

God has got every season planned & purposed for you and me. 

God is good and you are loved in every single one of these seasons, whether that is in a crazy storm or in warm sunshine. 

God is calling you to live and love for Jesus and others.

 God is saying "come with me, I will take you through this year, don't you worry child."

.... Ask yourself,

are you ready to wait patiently, 

persevere intentionally,

seek His purpose,

trust in His plan,

encourage & build up others,

enjoy and embrace times of busyness,

rest in the moments of quietness,

inspiringly create,

simply meditate,

be thankful in all,

be vulnerable & open,

be confident & bold,

nourish & indulge,

pursue & be pursued,

live in and live out faith, hope, and love...

?

And while you and I both reflect on just these few things...

Here is a recipe for my homemade avocado dip!

1 Avocado

2 Birds Eye Chilli's, chopped finely

2 Gloves of garlic, crushed

Juice of one lemon

1/4 cup of chopped fresh basil leaves

salt and pepper to taste

Simply combine all ingredients in a food processor (small hand processor works well and less mess to clean up!) until combined.

This is delicious with everything from wholegrain bread, crackers, in a salad dressing, with carrot sticks, as a spread on wraps and sandwiches, or even use as a avocado style pesto on some wholegrain pasta! 

Note: If you can't handle a lot of spice- go easy on the chilli!

Enjoy! Let us begin the new year energised and spiced up for what God has in store for us!

Storage.

"Not enough storage space."

For the past few months I have been reading these words on my phone. And to be honest, I don't know enough about my iPhone (or care enough really), to fix the problem.  I'm sure it's a simple problem to overcome, but at the moment I have decided to ignore it.

In some way, this made me think of my heart, mind and soul. 

In all honesty, sometimes my emotional, mental and spiritual self feel like they are choc-oh-block, full...like there is no more room left inside me because I am storing so much in every aspect of myself.

Yesterday, I went with my friend to IKEA and observed all of the millions of storage boxes, containers, shelves, draws....and for someone as organised as me, I must admit it was just a bit exciting. 

But this made me wonder about how I organise, compartmentalise and store my life. 

Don't get me wrong, being organised and knowing exactly where everything is stored is a beneficial and positive achievement! But I can see how it can become an attempt to control the uncertain and changing seasons of life. 

And I can see how I do this with every aspect of my life, trying to store certain emotions, experiences, anxieties and even relationships, into certain types and sizes of storage boxes, or places, within myself.

Although,  in truth I think no matter how many places you have to store your thoughts and feelings, there becomes a point where there is not enough storage space left.

This realisation only means one thing: you need to make room, spring clean, remove the clutter and empty some places...because you need to create more space for certain other things in life.

One aspect of my life in which I need to empty the box in order to refill it, is the anxiety and worry box. The box where I store all my thoughts and fears about my relationships and future...which take up one to many boxes within my soul. 

And the worst is that these places inside myself, where I feel burdened and darkened by problems of this world, seem to just be stored up... not going anywhere and of no real use.

What if I emptied these spaces?

What if I cleaned out these burden-filled places which store some of my darkest anxieties and fears?

And more then that, what if I filled these with thoughts and experiences of Jesus and other people.

One song that I love at the moment is called "Cold is the Night" by The Oh Hello's. And one of my favourite lines from the song are these words,

"take this burden away from...

bury it before it buries me." 

I think if we let God un-clutter, empty and take away these burdens, anxieties and fears...away from the places in which they are stored in our hearts, we can fill ourselves and store up things of value, worth, hope and joy. Treasures, not tears. 

Because if we don't let Him empty us, He can't fill us.

I have seen dark places in a soul being filled with love, joy and hope. These stored up thoughts and experiences that can bury our souls can be emptied and carried away by Jesus. 

Of course we will always need to empty to be able to store these things. 

To be honest, I don't think anyone can have empty spaces within themselves. I think that these spaces are full, but are just storing the wrong things...fears, past experiences and regrets, worry, shame or guilt. 

But we can store up things much, much greater. God can fill us with things and opportunities that can't be compartmentalised or controlled, but can be stored within our hearts and souls.

Steph's artwork. 

bloglovin!

<a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/10347389/?claim=rg9muwu8jmb">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

blog update!

I miss blogging regularly...

THEREFORE, after I finish my last semester of Uni for 2013 (ahh finished second year already!) I will be blogging again and starting up a series ( secret for now) that I hope will be really encouraging and positive for anyone who reads!

Until then.

BecomingSteph. x

Dry Skin.

This is a poem ( free form) that I wrote while just reflecting in peace in a park at twilight.

It's the dry, falling skin from the body, after a season of cold, harsh air.
It's the cracks that age her youthful fingers.
It's the bitter winter that wore her down,
into the rocky ground.
It's the piercing winds that held her captive from the warmth...

The changing hue in the trees,
Bring hope in learning how breathe, again.

Will the breath be anew?
From seasons past,
The bruises and scars,
Left the immovable marks.
Will the captive be free,
Will the flower rise from dust,
Will the streams be filled once more?

To see her hands, soft and tender,
Once again. 

all together

To be honest- I am tired of having a desire to answer everything straight away, wanting to do things as soon as possible, and looking for ways to just get things done, finished, ticked off my list. 

And this applies to my spiritual life also- I am always wanting God to answer now, when I think I need an answer, when I am ready and waiting... but the mystery of God is just that- a mystery. Some things I ponder and pray about...and the God-reality is, I might not be given an answer smack bang right that second, smack bang in my face...

For instance, this has been on my mind and has caused me to reflect a lot and caused me to ask God a lot of deeply rooted questions...

I think it would be easier to deal with one thing, one experience, one moment, one taste, one person.... at a time...

not all together, all at once.

Maybe then we could be and feel and love all the more in each moment? 

Maybe then we could truly embrace, truly chase everything fully...

Why do You give & take so much, all in the same season?

Is our life really like seasons? Isn't there so much blurring in between our emotions, relationships and experiences that to define a season as good, bad, hard, easy....just doesn't make sense?

God, is it because You challenge, confront, comfort, love, bless, heal, grow - in every moment of everyday and sometimes we just choose not to see it?

Is Your mystery then a way to teach us how to carry the weight of life, the mystery of each day, with You if we trust and believe?

Maybe I won't ever know the answer. Maybe I will go on wondering... wondering how Your daughter can be so loved even when she is so, so far away from fully loving You in my every moment.